Making friends is hard. I don't like it anymore

I'm not okay

I will never be okay

You know why?

Because friendship is hard and life is hard

and I feel like crying everyday now because I'm just so

ARGH FRUSTRATION

This is one of the reasons why I wanted to learn psychology

To study people and find out what makes them tick

And what ticks them off

I know she has been ticked off and is very unstable right now, but I didn't know it was to that extent

A line was crossed that I never knew existed

If Mandy is someone you talk to and she doesn't listen, Reine is like double and worse

At least Mandy she listens, and might follow. Reine is like fuck you

Especially if it is something bad about herself. Like, even if you tell her gently she'll somehow make it worse and then not talk to you for a while

My brain is more guy than I thought. I always want to talk things out. I rather you talk to me and throw all the shit in my face than letting it simmer and fade because it does not fade. It will not go away. It will get worse and here is the worse part: it will build up.

And dear GOD I know this is just a rough patch you are putting me through and I know it will blow over

But at least help me make up my mind about whether I should stay or should I go

Because right now I really want to go but my heart says stay and talk it out

 Fight or flight as they say

I don't know what to do